Ingram the Conqueror: Saturday and Sunday May 11th and 12th, Mother's Day

After our whirlwind of a week, we were looking forward to a relaxing weekend...at least as relaxing as it could be in the midst of lots of fun things to do! Lindsey and Daddy went on a special date to Build-A-Bear while the rest of us stayed home. Ingram, Madison, and Madison's friend Megan decided to go running and then jump in the pool afterwards, but the heater had been turned off. Since Ingram only rode down the street and back on his scooter, he wasn't as ready for cool water as the girls were and didn't stay in long at all! Daddy and Lindsey had been gone for several hours, but they were enjoying "Daddy/Daughter time." Then Ingram and Daddy went to see Mr. Brent play in a baseball tournament during nap time instead of taking a nap; I'm pretty sure Ingram needed that nap, but he did pretty good at the game cheering for Mr. Brent. Once we were all back together, we had a pretty eventful night of "Tickle Monster" and had to call it quits before the final page was read. Beau decided to go into protective mode and caught Daddy's elbow in his mouth while he was chasing the kids. I guess in Beau's eyes, he was guarding the kids from a big, furry, blue-handed monster. After the kids finally made it to bed, Beau snuck around to Daddy and jumped up onto the chair to snuggle and apologize with they (Beau and Daddy) watched TV.

Sunday morning, I was greeted with a Mother's Day surprise like no other! I heard a noise and woke up but didn't see anything...until I opened the bathroom door and found my family standing in the restroom holding my "Breakfast in the Bathroom" instead of "Breakfast in Bed!" I know they're crazy, but they're also creative; I don't think I've ever heard of anyone else getting their day started quite like that! They all piled in the bed and Beau came in and jumped up as well to join in the celebration of my kids since they're the reason I'm a Mother today. We headed to church and then went out to lunch at the kids favorite Sunday place...Carrabba's where they continued to be crazy! We spent much of the day running around with each other and playing and running around some more until we grilled out for dinner and the kids and Daddy swam while it was cooking.

All weekend long, I couldn't help but think about all of our friends who have lost children this past year and it was really difficult to be truly joyful. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy and thankful, but our daily lives have been so similar at St. Jude with Radiation, Chemotherapy, and everything else in between, that it's hard to get through an occasion such as Mother's Day the same as we had before. It has such a different meaning now and I don't even know how to explain it. Last year for Mother's Day, we went away for the weekend to the Lake to have family time and it was really great. We were a month into being St. Jude patients and a couple weeks into Radiation, but I think still in shock with everything that was happening. On this Mother's Day, the shock has definitely worn off, Ingram's active cancer treatment is over, and we are attempting to figure out our new pattern of life. I know our lives will never be the same as before because nothing is the same anymore because of the Cancer and the new way we view everything. I know my emotions are starting to come out more and I have a very hard time looking at pictures of Ingram during treatment; but I cannot wrap my mind and my heart around the possibility of not having Ingram with us right now after everything we've been through this year. My heart aches for our sweet friends who are missing their babies on their first Mother's Day without them on this Earth, but I pray they are being comforted by our Heavenly Father in a way that the rest of us can't comfort them. So at the Dismuke house, we've been staying up a little later and hugging a little tighter...